Is it possible to get rid of emotions. How to get rid of emotions. How to get rid of excessive excitability

Instructions

Understand that it is impossible to completely get rid of emotions. Emotions are an integral and, most importantly, a natural part of human life. Artificially stopping emotions, with them, if it works out, it will be extremely short, and besides, such violent practices are fraught with various side effects and "distortions" in the mind. So, you cannot get rid of emotions, but you can learn to control them, especially negative ones.

Play sports or any active outdoor activity. You can walk your dog, ride a bike, do morning and evening jogging, play tennis, go to the pool. Exercise is known to help get rid of negative thoughts and emotions.

Practice meditation. Get away from your emotions. Various types of yoga and meditative practices are based on the thesis that emotions are something superficial and impermanent, which does not have a real "I". If you start to cultivate this idea in yourself and about it, when emotions you don't need overwhelm you, then you can learn to distance yourself from them. And thus, maintain a sober thinking and act out of reason.

Switch from your problems to the other person's. If someone you know is going through a crisis or a difficult period, support him, show concern. You will find that this will help you distract yourself. Trying to understand other people's experiences will help you see that it is a purely emotional perception of life that blocks a person from a clear view of things. Emotions are always biased, that's why they should not be trusted one hundred percent.

If you find yourself in a tense situation, do not let your emotions "blow up" you. Count to 10 silently, or take three deep breaths in and out. You need to wait a little, let the emotional wave settle within you. If you feel that this does not help either, leave the room in which an unpleasant situation unfolds for you. A change of scenery will give the senses new impressions and you can calm the emotional storm within yourself.

note

Always analyze situations that happen to you and in which emotions take over the mind. Try to understand why this is happening, at what point you cannot say to yourself - "stop, I'm going in the wrong place."

Helpful advice

If you can't help yourself and want to throw something at the wall, smash all the vases and plates in the house, or beat the pillow ... Stop. Better to take a rag, mop in your hands and wash the floor throughout the apartment, wipe the dust, wash the blanket or jeans on your hands. This is where physical effort comes in handy. In other words, do some mechanical manual work to calm yourself down.

In the lives of many women, non-reciprocal love is found, and everyone who has experienced it knows how depressed a person feels, experiencing one-sided feelings, to whom the object of sympathy is cold. If there is no hope for reciprocity on the part of the other person, and your feelings can only upset you yourself even more, you need to make an effort to overcome them and start a new life. How to do it?

Instructions

First of all, stop feeling sorry for yourself and gain confidence in your own strengths and intentions. Convince yourself not to regret what is impossible to achieve, and try to perceive your feelings as something in the past, which should be forgotten, as yesterday.

Think about the fact that you love and value yourself, and do not allow yourself to worry about a person for whom you mean nothing. If the object of your sympathy has clearly expressed his reluctance to build with you, has shown indifference and lack of interest - you do not need this person, and he is not your destiny. Maintain your dignity - forget it, do not complain or discuss your failure with other people.

Everyone knows that it is not so easy to forget a person who is sunk into the soul - but for this there are a lot of distracting maneuvers that will occupy you so much that you simply will not have enough time for non-existent feelings.

Maintain a cheerful mood, chat with friends, do your favorite things - grow flowers, walk, exercise and dance, draw, read books, go to parties, watch and listen to music. All this will perfectly help to distract from the departed feelings.

Take care of yourself - buy yourself a beautiful thing, use your favorite cosmetics, sign up for a beauty salon, cook your favorite dish. Understand that life goes on, and it is filled with many interesting events and pleasant things.

Think about whether you have a dream or some goal that you have long wanted to achieve, but lacked the time and determination? If there is such a goal, this is the very moment to start realizing it. Feel free to go to language courses, to a dance studio, on a trip, to the pool - learn what you have always dreamed of. You will understand that your unrequited feelings pale in comparison with new vivid impressions.

Love yourself - only then will your next love be mutual. If you carry with you a train of resentment and self-doubt, the story of unrequited feelings may repeat itself, since men love cheerful and confident women.

Maintain a sense of inner harmony, enjoy each new day, have fun looking at yourself in the mirror. Fill your life with a variety of events that develop both your body and your soul - and you will feel how life is improving, and a lot of new prospects open up ahead.

Unhappy love is not so rare. She can torment and drain a person, pushing him to desperate actions. If love causes only torment, it is necessary to get rid of it as soon as possible.

Instructions

The very first action that must be taken in order to out of love is to decide that you really want to pull it out of it. Many of those who have suffered from unrequited love for years have not taken this simple step. If you understand that your being is rebelling against this act, ask yourself - why do you not want to end the feeling that has tormented you? Maybe you like to feel like a victim, or want revenge, or hope for a happy ending? Understand your expectations and tell yourself that all the time that you could enjoy life and new relationships, you are wasting in suffering from what is already in the past. Reassure yourself that for the future, you need to make this important decision now.

Undoubtedly, you will want to return to your memories more than once, to relive what happened again and again. This is unproductive, even if the memories are pleasant and take you back to the times when you were happy. Remember that all the time that you remember, you are not living in the present. Therefore, it is necessary to make these memories dull and uninteresting, so that one does not want to return to them. Moreover, they must be made faded in the most literal sense. When a bright and exciting scene from the past comes to your mind, make it gray, as if faded. Think of it as an old black and white movie running through your head. Repeat this practice every time memories come to your mind, and very soon they will stop tormenting you.

If you want to talk it out, it is better to do it not with your friends, but entrust your misfortune to a piece of paper. Throw out everything that gnaws and gnaws on it, and then just burn it. Observe how the paper burns and imagine how your experiences burn along with it.

Constant employment will help to get rid of love. Load up all your time with something to do, come up with activities that will keep you busy all day and fall asleep in the evening, barely resting your head on the pillow. With this mode of time, there will be no time to feel sad and longing at all. And if some malicious thought breaks into your consciousness, firmly tell her: “This is all in the past. And a wonderful and wonderful future awaits me! "

Express emotions

The most unexpected way to get rid of emotions is to be aware of it and "splash out". We can say that this method is the antipode of suppressing emotions, but it is highly effective, although it requires a number of specific actions. Take a piece of paper and write on it in detail what exactly torments you, describe your emotions, do not be afraid to use "strong" wording. The more sincere and detailed the text is, the easier it will be for you to realize how much this feeling ruins your life. After that, you need to “shout out” your emotions. To do this, go to a deserted place, like a morning park or forest, a deserted beach or an abandoned building on the outskirts of the city. Gather your strength and admit your feelings and worries out loud. If you find it difficult to do it loudly, start with a whisper, and then try to speak about it louder, it is best to end up shouting a confession. This method gives temporary relief, every time when emotions overwhelm you and interfere with your life, resort to it.

Sublimation and visualization

The second way suggests taking advantage of your position. Unrequited love makes you perceive the world more strongly and sharply, which is conducive to creativity. Try to write novels or poetry, philosophize or play music. Creativity helps to avoid frustration, dissatisfaction. If you engage in it persistently enough, you can transform your love, make it a source of inspiration, change the way you approach it.

The third method suggests engaging in awareness of your problem and visualization of getting rid of it. Imagine unrequited love as a splinter or a needle that has sunk into your heart. Imagine pulling it out with a suitable tool and throwing it into the water. Watch how the needle sinks and the splinter floats away from you. After that, imagine how the wound from her in your heart begins to heal. This exercise should be done several times a day for a week, every time you feel a fit of despair and falling in love. Very soon you will feel relieved, your emotions will dull, and your life will become easier.

When a person has a trouble, he begins to scream, cry, somehow show his feelings. These are natural responses to stress. However, not all people are ready to express their emotions, some simply close themselves off from others and want to be alone with themselves. If a person is depressed for a long time, he can get psychological disorders. Therefore, it is very important to recognize when a loved one is trying to hide something.

The man is silent

Prolonged silence suggests that the person is trying to suppress their emotions. Now he thinks only about the problem and can temporarily "leave" reality. Sometimes a person says that he is not happy with silence.

From joy to sadness

A person can be in a joyful state all day and smile. However, at one point it will break down on an obvious trifle. This behavior indicates that the person has a problem, but has not yet found a solution.

The desire to be alone

When a person is tormented by a problem, he looks for an opportunity to be alone with himself. Now your friend is not ready to let you into his troubles. He just wants to be alone with his problems and emotions.

Alcohol

Unfortunately, many people still think that alcohol solves problems. However, it can only aggravate the situation. Your friend is at risk of becoming an alcoholic. Take a closer look at your friend, perhaps he is trying to justify his suppression of emotions with fatigue.

Get distracted

Perhaps your friend has found a new hobby that he was not interested in before. Take a closer look at him. If a friend devotes some time to his new hobby every day, and it makes him happy, then he is thinking about self-development. If he spends all the time at a new occupation, plunging into it with his head, and then abruptly gives up his new hobby. So he needed this business in order to distract himself.

Absent-mindedness and feeling unwell

When your friend constantly forgets about his promises, during a conversation he always asks again, this means that he is constantly thinking about something. And although your friend tries to behave as before, thinking about the problem does not allow him to live peacefully.

Solution options

If you find that your friend's behavior is consistent with these characteristics, talk to him. However, you will be prepared that your friend will throw out all the negative emotions on you. You can go the other way. Invite your friend for an extreme vacation. For example, go kayaking, fly airplanes or parachutes, or hike in the mountains. All this will help the friend to throw out all the negative emotions. However, if the problem is really very serious and it cannot be solved with the help of extreme, it is better to seek help from a doctor.

Love

Love is rightly considered the queen of all feelings. It is love that turns our existence into real life. She personifies forward movement, aspiration, flight of the soul.

It is difficult to imagine a person who would like to get rid of the feeling of love. However, this is happening everywhere. The lack of reciprocity or the inability to be together with a person - and we do our best to erase him from our life. Circumstances force us to work “at the wrong” job - we try not to remember our dreams. And there are a lot of such examples. However, if you try to get rid of the feeling of love, it will lead you to a gradual numbness and extinction as the opposite of life and prosperity.

Fear

Fear is "presented" to us by a sense of self-preservation. It is not difficult to imagine what would have happened to humanity if people by nature did not know fear. Fear protects us from real danger, makes it clear in time that we need to be saved.

The ban on fear leads us to anxiety. Unlike situational and justified fear, which "burns out" if given free rein, anxiety is much deeper. It often takes the form of a chronic anticipation of an experience of horror, regardless of whether something might really threaten you or not. In particularly difficult situations, generalized anxiety disorder may occur when a person is in a constant state of tension and mobilization. At the same time, he himself understands that there is nothing dangerous around him, but he can no longer cope with anxiety.

Anger

Anger helps us defend our boundaries. It's like a sensor that gives a signal when someone invades our territory. If a stranger tries to take your hand, then ideally your first reaction should be a flash of anger and an attempt to pull away. If your friend takes your things without asking, you will also feel anger and only then will you understand the situation. This is a normal reaction.

If you suppress anger and don't learn to adequately defend your boundaries, it will gradually lead to feelings of anger. You are already angry not for any specific violation of your boundaries, but always expect a catch from everyone, are ready to defend and even attack in advance.

Sadness

Sadness is a feeling that allows us to live and accept the losses that everyone in life certainly has. With the help of sadness, we have the opportunity to burn out what was dear to us and continue to live on.

If you forbid yourself to be sad, it will be replaced by longing. And the problem with melancholy is that it is addressless. If we are sad about something or someone, we have something to remember, where to direct our energy, how to live this state, then we simply yearn “into emptiness”. This is an exhausting condition that is often very difficult to deal with. Longing can lead us in two directions: either depression, or thoughtless and sometimes riotous activity.

To understand and determine whether we are living our feelings correctly, it is worth listening to ourselves. Any of the forbidden feelings will be reflected in your life as discomfort or suffering. If, on the whole, you feel joy and satisfaction from life, then you are moving in the right direction.

It is okay to feel anger sometimes, as long as you do not press it, but live it safely. To be in a claim to the world, when you want to control everything everywhere, and when this does not happen - to be angry all the time - this is already abnormal. How abnormal it is not to be able to control it. Control is to let off steam in ways that are safe for everyone, without leaving anything in yourself and without dumping anything on others. How to do this?

Emotions live only through the body - analysis by the brain gives nothing. Because they live in the body, and through the body they go out. If you think and analyze, then I understand everything with my head, but still enrages.

For example, you have a difficult relationship with your mom. And if you just let off steam and scream into the pillow, without changing anything in your attitude towards your mother, then this is pointless. This is the same as drinking pain relievers for a toothache and not going to the doctor. Teeth need to be treated, right? And the relationship needs to be healed. This is primary. justify; "\u003e We will talk most of all about anger, because it is not clear what to do with it and where to put it. And one way or another, in any complex interweaving of emotions, there is a lot of anger. The way out of many difficult states like guilt and resentment occurs through anger. And refusing to live it, we cannot go further.

But I ask you to separate anger as a momentary emotion that naturally appears when something does not happen the way you wanted (this is the nature of anger) and anger as a character trait, that is, anger. It is okay to feel anger sometimes, as long as you do not press it, but live it safely. To be in a claim to the world, when you want to control everything everywhere, and when this does not happen - to be angry all the time - this is already abnormal. How abnormal and not be able to control it.

Controlling anger doesn't mean not feeling it or suppressing it.

The control is to let off steam in a way that is safe for everyone, leaving nothing in yourself and not dumping anything on others. Imagine that anger is a natural waste of the body, just like digested food. What happens if you consider this case "dirty" and stop going to the toilet? Forbid yourself to do this? What will be the outcome? Maybe our task is to create such a "toilet" for emotions - a place where we calmly and safely do something without harming anyone?

And I ask you very much to avoid premature spirituality in emotions. This is when it boils and hurts inside, and we press it all from above with the word "no" and delve into the reasons. Most often, this is how we treat other people's feelings, they say, I'll tell you now why you flew in by karma! Reasons are sought after the emotion has been released. It will be much easier for you to see all this with a sober head. Live first. Or let the person live, help him in this.

Now let's get started. I want to divide the ways of living emotions into constructive and destructive. Those that are harmless and those that hurt someone.

Destructive ways:

Pour on other people, especially those who "passed by".

At work, the boss took it out, but he couldn't express it in his face, so we come home - and it hits a cat, who turned up under the arm, that is, under his leg, or a child who again brought a “three”. Sound familiar? And it seems that you will break through and it will become easier, but then comes the feeling of guilt - after all, the cat or the child has nothing to do with it.

Rudeness.

In the same situation, when the boss was infuriated, but the anger remained inside, you can not take this bomb home, knowing that it will explode there. And pour out your anger on the saleswoman who works slowly and makes a mistake, on those who stepped on your foot or crossed the road, and at the same time on those who are very annoying with a happy face. And also of little use. Even if there is no feeling of guilt, the negative emotions of another person, on whom all this is poured, will definitely return to us one day. Again. That's how they walk back and forth, while we are rude to each other.

Internet trolling

This method seems safer and more unpunished. An anonymous page without an avatar, even if with an avatar, they won't find and beat them for sure. Brought out the boss - you can go to someone's page and write nasty things - they say, that's how ugly! Or write nonsense! Or provoke some kind of argument on a complex topic, pouring mud on opponents, poking them with a needle in different places to hurt. But the law of karma also works here, even if the laws of the state are not yet everywhere.

Eat sweets

Another way that we, by the way, often see in films. When the heroine is abandoned by her beloved or cheated on her, what does she do? I have this picture in front of my eyes: a crying girl in bed watching a movie and eating a huge jar of ice cream. The harm of such an event, I think, is clear to many.

Swear

Another way may look like this: you got nasty, and you are rude in return. My husband came yelling at you - and you are yelling at him too. You seem to be honest. The person is the cause of your negative feelings, they urgently need to be expressed. But by doing so, you only fan the fire, intensify the conflict, and nothing good comes of it. A quarrel always takes out all our strength, including all hidden reserves, and after it we remain devastated and unhappy. Even if the argument is won.

Beat someone

Again - children, dogs, husband, boss (well, you never know). Any person who is the cause of your anger or just came to hand. Corporal punishment for children during a parent's emotional breakdown is very traumatic. They provoke in the child both a feeling of humiliation and a reciprocal hatred, which he cannot express in any way. If you hit your husband, you can get change, which, unfortunately, is not uncommon. And I have seen statistics that about half of women who have suffered from domestic violence started a fight first, not expecting that a man can fight back. This does not justify men, but it does not honor women either.

Suppress

There is a belief that anger is bad. The more religious a woman is, the more she suppresses anger. She pretends that nothing drives her out of herself, smiles tightly at everyone, and so on. Further, anger has two ways out - to explode in a safe place (again at home, on relatives) - and this she will not be able to control. And the second option is to hit her health and body. It seems to me no coincidence that today so many people are dying from cancer, this is a disease of unlived emotions, as many psychologists have repeatedly written about.

Smashing dishes and breaking things

On the one hand, the method is constructive. Better to break a plate than hit a child. And you can probably use it sometimes. But if we destroy some things on our way, then we need to understand that then all this will need to be restored. My husband once destroyed his laptop in a rage. It was a terrible sight, and then I had to buy a new computer. It is costly, and therefore less constructive than we would like.

Slam the door

It seems to me that this method is sweet to many teenagers. And I remember myself like that, and I already see children like that in places. In principle, not the worst way. Only once I slammed the door so hard that the glass broke in it. And so nothing special.

Beat with words

You don't always need hands to hit a person. We women are good at doing it with words. Poke pain points, sore, pin up - and then pretend that we are not to blame and nothing to do with. The more various dirt within us, the more sharp and sarcastic our tongue is. I remember myself, before, when I didn't know where to put my feelings, I constantly teased everyone. Many called me "an ulcer", I could not restrain myself. I thought it was funny.

The more I learn to experience feelings, the softer my speech becomes. And the less it has any kind of "hairpins". Because nothing good and it does not give anyone. For a couple of minutes, you can feed your ego and at the same time destroy relationships and earn karmic reactions.

Revenge

Often, in a fit of anger, it seems that if we take revenge and wash away the shame with the help of the enemy's blood, it will become easier for us. I know that some women during a quarrel with her husband to spite him have sex with someone, for example. This is a blissful option, which many consider acceptable, especially if the husband has cheated. But what is the bottom line? Revenge only aggravates the conflict and increases the distance between us. Revenge is different - subtle and rough. But there is no benefit from any of them. Nobody.

Sex

Not the best way to discharge, although it is physical. Because sex is still an opportunity to show love for each other, and not use each other as exercise machines. Our mood during intimacy greatly affects our relationship in general. And casual contacts with just anyone, for relaxation, are not only not useful, but also harmful.

Shopping

Women often go to the store in frustration. And they buy a lot of unnecessary things there. Sometimes they even deliberately spend more money than necessary in order to take revenge, for example, on their husband. But it turns out that at this time we are given the resources that are given to us for good deeds - that is, money - we let go at random and try to harm another with their help. What will be the result? Resources will run out. And what they were spent on will not be useful. The dress you bought in anger will absorb your condition and make it difficult for you to wear it.

The list turned out to be impressive, not entirely joyful, but nevertheless, more often than not, this is exactly what we do. Because we do not have a culture of dealing with feelings. We were not taught this, they never talk about it anywhere - they only ask to remove our feelings from the field of vision. And that's all.

Constructive ways of experiencing emotions:

Let the feelings be.

Sometimes - and by the way, very often, for the feeling to live, it is enough to see it, call it by its name and accept. That is, in a moment of anger, say to yourself: “Yes, I'm very angry now. And that's okay. " It is very difficult for all those who have been explained that it is not normal (because it is inconvenient for others). It’s hard to admit that you’re angry right now, even though it’s written on your face. It is difficult to say that this also happens. Sometimes it is difficult to understand, but what kind of feeling is this? I remember in the constellations a girl whose nodules were shaking, her hands strained into fists, and she called her feelings "sorrow." Learning to understand how this feeling is a matter of practice and time. For example, you can watch yourself. At critical moments, look in the mirror to understand what is on your face, follow the signs of the body, observe the tension in the body and the signals in it.

Stomp.

In traditional Indian dances, a woman stomps a lot, it is not so noticeable, because she dances barefoot. But in this way, through energetic movements from the body to the ground, all tension goes away. We often laugh at Indian films, where from any event - good or bad - they dance, but there is a special truth in this. To live any feelings through the body. Letting your anger run through you as you vigorously release it through energetic tides. By the way, there are many such movements in Russian folk dances.

It is not necessary to go to the dancing section right now (although why not?). Try to close your eyes and, feeling an emotion in your body, with the help of your footstops, “give” it to the ground. Of course, it is best to stomp on the ground rather than on the tenth floor of a high-rise building. It's even better if you can do it barefoot on grass or sand. You will physically feel how much easier it becomes.

And don't think about what it looks like. Ideal, of course, if no one sees you or distracts you. But if there is no such place, close your eyes and stomp.

Shout.

Some trainings practice a form of cleansing such as screaming. When we shout to the floor, with a partner who helps us, we can also shout into the pillow and in any other way. Some important word is usually shouted. For example, "Yes" or "No" - if it suits your emotion. You can just shout "Aaaaa!" Take a deep breath and then open your mouth and empty your heart in this way. So several times, until you feel emptiness inside.

Sometimes before that they do some kind of "pumping" - at first they breathe very, very quickly, exclusively through the nose.

There are weaknesses in this technique. For example, neighbors and household. The scream is very loud. And if you cannot relax and not worry, then it will not heal. The scream should come from a relaxed throat, otherwise you may seriously lose your voice. The first time it is better to try this somewhere with experienced people, then the effect will be greater.

Speak out.

The feminine way. For any feeling to live, we really need to talk about it, tell someone. About how the boss offended, and someone on the bus called. Not so much even to get support (which is also nice), but to pour it out of yourself. Approximately because of these people go to psychologists to get everything that eats away at their heart from there. One friend, who has been working as a psychologist for a very long time, once shared that one simple way helps most of her clients. She listens to them, asks questions so that they describe the situation as voluminously as possible, and that's it. Doesn't give any recipes, tips. Just listening. And often at the end of a conversation, a person has a solution. It goes by itself. It was as if the veil of anger that had covered his eyes had been removed, and he saw the way.

Women do the same with each other, speaking out. There are only two points here. You cannot tell anyone about your family life - about the problems in it. Otherwise, these problems can be exacerbated. And if they tell you something, you should not give advice. Just listen. It is possible, by the way, to organize such a circle in which women share all their emotions - and then somehow symbolically say goodbye to them (which is often done in women's groups).

Be careful not to dump all your emotions on your husband. He just can't stand it. If you talk to your friends, first get their consent to it. And do not forget to share the good too (otherwise your friend may feel like a "toilet bowl", which is needed only to drain negative emotions). It's great if you can cry to mom or dad, if you have a mentor who listens to you, or a husband who is willing to do it.

Any of our blocks and clamps in the body are unlived emotions. Of course, I'm not talking about light stroking, but about deep work with the body, with a forceful impact. A high-quality massage that kneads these points helps us to cope with emotions. In this place, the main thing - as in childbirth - is to open up pain. They push you somewhere, you feel pain - breathe and relax towards the pain. Tears may also flow from the eyes - this is normal.

A good massage therapist will immediately see your weak points - and he knows exactly where and how you need to press to remove the clamp. But often it hurts so much that we stop it - and don't go further. Then massage becomes a pleasant relaxation procedure, but does not help to relieve emotions.

When you are up to date, sometimes you want to hit someone. A husband, for example, or a child to spank. Try at this moment to switch to a pillow - and beat it from the heart. The main thing is not to sleep on such a pillow - let it be your sports equipment, which lies separately. You can cry into it. Or you can get yourself a punching bag and gloves. Also an option, however, it requires free space at home.

Hit the sofa with a rolled towel.

All of us, from time to time, are captured by emotions. Alas, not only joyful ones.

I already wrote that most of our Emotions represent Conditioned reflex.

No matter how hard we try, if a person (or situation) causes unpleasant feelings in us, we cannot get rid of negative emotions and avoid the occurrence of this Reflex.

In the best case - only to reduce the external manifestation of emotion, forcing its energy inside.

It turns out "Vicious Circle".

photo from the site esens.deviantartcom

If we do not show the Emotion in full force, it is extinguished inside our body.

And in addition to discomfort, it causes various muscle clamps, a disorder of our nervous system.

A punching bag, or at worst - a hole into which you can shout all unspoken emotions - is also not always at hand. All of this affects our mood and well-being, provoking illness and stress.

I really like one saying: " Emotion suppression is a ticking time bomb. If you bury an emotion, you bury it alive! "

So what do you do then?

And with less health loss?

This has happened to you: you sit in some pleasant place (or in your favorite kitchen) and taste your favorite dish. You are completely absorbed in its aromas, appearance and amazing taste. Savor literally every bite, experiencing great pleasure from the very process of eating.

And you even lick your plate (in the kitchen it is quite acceptable 🙂 Once, I saw such a picture in a restaurant :) The man licked his plate so deliciously that I wondered: what was he eating?).

Time passes....

And now, turning on the TV at your leisure, you see how the famous host of the culinary show is trying the very dish that you ate with great gusto in a restaurant (or in your favorite cuisine) just a couple of weeks ago.

Perhaps all this will stir up pleasant memories in you, and even intensify the process of secretion of gastric juice.

But, you see, these are Two Big Differences:

Himself has a favorite dish! Or Watch it on TV!

The moment of enjoying your favorite dish can be compared to Associated Perception.

Watching a program on TV - with Dissociated Perception.

Although, I hope that without this, you understand the difference well.

P.S These metaphors are a very general example. And in life, everything is much more complicated, and depends on the individual characteristics of our perception. There are people who manage to eat even the most delicious food as if there was a piece of rubber on their plate.

Main ingredients of the dish

called "STRESS":

THOUGHTS

EMOTIONS

FEEL

The stronger Emotions we experience, the stronger our Feelings, and, accordingly, the level of Stress!

The strength of an emotion is directly related to how much we Associate with it.

We will not be able to completely get rid of unpleasant emotions, because we have not yet learned how to control our Conditioned Reflexes.

But it is easy to significantly reduce their impact!

For this you need to Dissociate from them.

To do this, shift the focus of your attention not only to the Emotion itself, but also to the Feelings that it evokes in you.

Look, where the Sensations are localized in your body?

If we compare our Emotions and Feelings, then the former represent a faster process:

"Did you see what they did to your car? Some goat painted graffiti on it!"

And even if in a minute you realize that your good friends have played a trick on you since April 1, and the fear will pass, the heart will beat for some time.

Observing your Feelings, you Dissociate from Emotion, and it gradually begins to Fade.

If possible, you can not only observe, but even pronounce all your Feelings.

Some people have the Dissociation skill innate. They are also called "thick-skinned".

Is it good? Hardly. They also look at everything good that happens to them in life with a detached view.

The best thing is when you know how to use Dissociation in some difficult situations when you need to get rid of unpleasant emotions or

Try EXERCISE * "Puppet".

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With its help, you will learn to Dissociate from negative emotions.

And you can use this skill if necessary!

* Exercise by the practicing psychologist M. Sandomirsky

ALL THE BEST,

WITH THANKS, ARINA

Man is a unique creature that is able to experience a whole galaxy of feelings and emotions that are inaccessible to other creatures living on our planet.

Of course, animals are also subject to certain feelings, such as fear and hunger, but the very process of their emergence and analysis is significantly different.

After all, human consciousness is able to control these processes, while in animals, the manifestation of feelings is an unconditional phenomenon. The question arises: why are we granted such advantages?

How to use them in everyday life? We will talk about this in our new material.

What are feelings and emotions?

As mentioned earlier, the process of the emergence of feelings in animals is unconditional.

This means that their source is the instincts fixed at the genetic level in the process of evolution.

In human consciousness, such mechanisms are also present, but in addition to them, we managed to acquire a huge number of other feelings.

Does the wolf know the feeling of shame when it kills defenseless herbivores?

Does he get angry and resentful when his victim escapes?

Every person dreams of being calm and balanced.

Oh no, such experiences are available only to man - the crown of evolution, according to scientists and researchers.

Tip: emotions and feelings are not identical concepts. Emotions have a subjective (individual) attachment and reflect a person's inner attitude to the situation, while feelings are objectively directed. “I'm afraid to be in the dark,” is a feeling. “I'm scared” is an emotion.

Interestingly, scientists have not been able to prove or disprove the fact that animals have an emotional background.

This is impossible, since a person cannot determine whether our younger brothers can assess this or that situation subjectively, individually.

But in the case of our species, there can be no doubt - each of us has a unique and complex set of neuropsychiatric regulators that allow us to react differently in each individual case.

This is our strength, and this is our weakness.

A person is able to control his feelings and emotions, but too often the opposite happens.

We become slaves of inner experiences, losing the ability to adequately respond to certain situations.

Why shut off your feelings and emotions?

Surely, each of us had situations when we made decisions based on fleeting feelings and emotions.

At the moment of committing a rash act, it seems to us that this is the only correct path.

This sense of self-righteousness is so strong that it overshadows any rational thinking.

Equally strong is the feeling of shame, when after a while, instead of emotions, a sober clarity comes to mind.

Emotions and feelings make us vulnerable, and people around us are sure to take advantage of this.

We can talk about working relationships or family conflicts, relationships between friends and relatives.

In all aspects of human life, rivalry occurs between people, in which our internal state plays an important role.

Moreover, feelings and emotions can directly affect our mental condition.

For example, people who too often give vent to their anger become more irritable and angry.

For those who too often indulge in despondency, the world around them becomes gray, devoid of positiveness and colors.

At the same time, there may be no reason for anger or sadness, or it may not be so serious as to deserve such strong emotional experiences.

Advice: emotions and feelings can destroy our psyche and directly affect our life.

At the same time, a person can experience a whole galaxy of positive inner feelings.

Love, joy and other positive feelings and emotions fill us from the inside and give us strength.

You need to think about whether you need to irrevocably turn them off, depriving yourself of simple human qualities.

It is these feelings that make us people capable of empathy, compassion, love and enjoyment of life.

Controlling emotions and feelings

You can turn off emotions and feelings, although only a few manage to do this for a long time.

In most cases, a person does not turn off, but suppresses his inner experiences, further aggravating the situation.

An abnormal perception of one's inner world leads to the fact that fears and complexes begin to arise in it, which sooner or later emerge and make their bearer unhappy.

You should not delude yourself into believing that you have managed to turn off your emotions and feelings, because in fact this is impossible.

A person cannot go against nature, and it is she who prescribes for him a model of behavior containing such psychophysical reactions.

But nature has endowed us with another powerful tool - consciousness. It is able to subjugate most of the processes taking place in our souls and bodies.

Tip: Instead of trying to suppress and shut off your feelings and emotions, learn to control them. By gaining inner discipline, you will be one step closer to happiness and understanding of this world.

The strength of human consciousness lies in the fact that he can understand the root of most problems, which means he can learn to control them, subordinate them to his will.

Although this is not as easy as saying, because most people are used to feeding their inner weaknesses, giving free rein to both positive and negative experiences.

Learning to cope with your inner world is not so easy.

You must adhere to clear rules:

Do not abuse alcohol and other substances that affect your consciousness. There is nothing worse than a person who becomes a slave to his addictions.
Practice mental exercises constantly. Simply put, you should pay attention to meditation as the main method of achieving inner balance.
Eat right and take care of your health. The use of semi-finished products and other harmful products is no less evil than an addiction to alcohol.
Adhere to basic moral principles. Doing bad deeds corrupts the human being. As a result, we lose control over ourselves, which means we become unhappy.

The power of consciousness lies in the fact that a person can understand the root of problems

The secret lies in the fact that a person must learn to restrain not only bad, but also good experiences.

You should not take everything to heart, burning up in the grip of emotions, albeit positive ones. Thus, the person is also capable of losing control of the situation.

In fact, strong emotional disturbances and experiences are able to spend all your inner energy, creating a vacuum.

Meditation as the main way to gain control over feelings and emotions

Meditation is an ancient practice that is found in many religious and spiritual teachings.

Its goal is to find inner balance, emotional balance, which is so lacking in modern man.

This is a great way to look inside yourself in search of the true causes of certain experiences.

There are many positive results that can be achieved through meditation, including:

Finding inner peace and balance
Serenity
The ability to control your mind, concentrating it on solving really important issues
Developing self-discipline

Tip: Lessons learned from the meditation process should be used in everyday life as well. Try to stay calm even in an emergency.

To meditate, you do not need to have excellent physical fitness or have an innate gift.

The keys to resolving your inner problems are hidden within you, however, not everyone is able to listen to their inner voice.

We suppress it every day for the sake of our base desires, be it money, power, fame or other things that please our pride.

But a person is not able to run away from himself forever, and sooner or later each of us runs the risk of facing the darkest sides of our inner world.

Meditation is aimed at sowing a seed of peace and balance instead of chaos in thoughts.

When this happens, all feelings and emotions, previously unbridled and inexplicable, become just another tool that you can easily subdue.

Any situations in life evoke certain emotions in us. Moreover, we are not even aware of most of them. Positive emotions do not harm us, but, on the contrary, cause a surge of strength, joy, lightness. But the negative ones take away energy. And that's not all. We forget most of them, but in fact they don't go anywhere. Any emotion is a charge of energy. And if it is not thrown out, then it remains in the body, forming into a block. With age, hundreds of such blocks accumulate in our business. They create muscle tightness, spasms, organ diseases, and other disorders, detrimental to health.

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Someone pushed us in the store - this caused indignation in us. But not wanting to make trouble, we restrain ourselves and the energy charge remains inside. After 15 minutes, we forget about the incident, but this charge is firmly stuck, most likely in the throat area (after all, we should have expressed indignation). And after 2-3 days, we may wonder why we got sore throat on a warm day. Believe it or not, our emotions can trigger disease in this way. Therefore, it is very important not to keep these blocks in oneself, but to get rid of them as soon as possible.

Below are 10 ways you can throw out negativity without hurting others and yourself.

1. Tears

Never hold yourself back if you feel like crying. The only exceptions are inappropriate situations when it is better not to give vent to tears. In this case, it is better to postpone this process for a more convenient time. The advice applies not only to women, but also to men. In our society, it is believed that men do not cry. But the comb then nature awarded them with lacrimal canals? In fact, tears are a wonderful natural way to force out resentment and even anger from yourself. Probably, many people know that after tears it always becomes easier and the head clears up. So cry for health!

2. Scream

There are times in life when you want to scream out of pain, resentment, worries. You don't need to restrain yourself in this desire either. Of course, in a modern city, it is difficult to find a suitable place to shout. It's good if there is a field nearby, or maybe an exit to a large roof or a window onto a deserted street. In extreme cases, you can drive a car further away, close all the windows and open up properly. It is not forbidden to mix screaming with tears and even swearing.

3. Reprimand for water

It has been proven that water absorbs external information and can convert energy. Not all people can cry and cry. For calmer natures, this simple method is suitable. It is preferable to sit by the river, but an open faucet in the bathroom will do. Sit down and calmly tell the water what you think. Speak out all the worries, worries, resentments and everything that you cannot tell people. Ask the water to carry all negativity deep into the ground and dissolve it. Do not forget to say thank you to the water at the end.

4. Whipping pillow

A proven method of splashing out emotions. For this, it is better to have a separate pillow. It is not recommended to sleep on it. Every time you are angry, angry or offended, knock on the pillow, hit it, say whatever you see fit to it. You can imagine in it a person to whom your stream of thoughts and emotions is addressed.

5. Letter

This method of dissolving grievances, claims and other similar feelings is recommended by many psychologists. Choose a time and place so that no one bothers you. Take paper, pen or pencil and write down whatever you want. You can write a letter to a specific person if you feel resentment towards him. It is very important to write here by hand, and not on a computer. Finally, you can burn the letter or tear it up, but be sure to get rid of the message.

6. Dancing

Active, selfless dances are very good at clearing away foreign energy and negative emotions. Pick up some of your favorite tracks and dance when no one sees you. Give yourself up to the dance completely, trying at these moments to imagine how all the energy blocks literally fly out of you. Dance until you feel very tired.

7. Bathing

As mentioned above, water can take away bad energy from us. To get rid of serious blocks and accumulated experiences, you need to swim not in a bath, but in a pond. It is desirable that the water be cold. It is necessary to make several jumps into the water with your head, and when diving up, each time imagining how you are clearing. After the procedure, you will feel light in your body and mind.

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8. Meditation

Today there are many visualization meditations to get rid of energy blocks created by negative emotions. Sometimes one session is enough, and in other cases it is required to do 5 or even 10 meditations in order to completely dissolve resentment, fear, irritation, anger. Pick the meditations that work for you and do them as needed.

9. Rest

This does not mean an ordinary rest, in the form of evening leisure or sleep, but a trip to new places. It can be a suburban area, an unexplored side of the forest, a sandy coast by the sea, a tourist voyage across countries, in a word, anything, if only with pleasure. During our stay in nature or on exciting travels, our energy changes and some blocks fly out by themselves.

10. Mindfulness

This method is available anytime, anywhere and in any situation, unlike all of the above. Mindfulness allows us to track our emotions in the here and now and instantly transform them. Take the same example at the store. They stepped on our feet, and it is quite natural that I want to say to a person: "hey, be careful, look where you are going." Especially if it happens after a hard day, when we are hungry and tired. This is how we think (in most cases), guided by instinct. But if you fall in love with awareness, you can instantly imagine yourself in the place of this person. Obviously, he didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. He, too, is tired and may have his own problems. He is very uncomfortable that he stepped on your foot and he did not wish you anything bad. In order not to conserve a block in your body, it is enough to immediately forgive this person and wish him well. You will immediately feel that your energy level has increased. You not only did not retain a bad emotion, but you also added positive energy.

Choose the best option for yourself, or maybe two or three at once, and try it out in action. Do not hold grudges in yourself, they destroy us from the inside. Goodbye, love and be truly happy!

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