What to do on parent's day at the cemetery. Orthodox traditions: what to do on a parent's day at the cemetery Parental days of visiting a cemetery

A huge number of holidays passed from paganism to Orthodoxy, one of which is parental day or Radonitsa. On this day, it is customary to remember all deceased relatives and visit their graves in the cemetery. After the baptism of Rus, nothing changed. Therefore, on parental day, we continue to observe the customs and traditions of our ancestors.

Radonitsa does not have a fixed date, so each year is celebrated on different days. The parent's day depends on the date of Easter, since it comes 9 days after it. This year, Orthodox Christians celebrate Holy Resurrection on April 8, which means that Radonitsa falls on April 17.

Parental day in 2018 what date: Radonitsa, its essence and history

Nevertheless, Radonitsa cannot be called an exclusively Christian holiday, because they began to celebrate it long before the baptism of Rus. In paganism, this day was also considered a day of remembrance of the dead, but traditions were associated with the cult of ancestors. The dead were treated with honor, so people showed their respect by visiting the cemetery. Interestingly, the church for a long time did not recognize visits to the cemetery. And only recently this custom became Orthodox.

The name of the holiday has a rather ambiguous history. Historians claim that it is marching from the word "kind", while others see the meaning in the word "joy". Moreover, our ancestors believed that their deceased relatives return to the land to their loved ones, which means we need to rejoice, not be sad.

Parental day in 2018 what date: signs on Radonitsa

The people have preserved many signs associated with Parents' Day. For example, it was considered a bad omen not to come to the dead at the cemetery. Our ancestors believed that then no one would come to this person's grave after his death.

It is strictly forbidden to engage in gardening work before this day. It was believed that this could cause drought, poor harvest or death of loved ones. It was considered a bad omen to rain in the morning, especially if there was a strong wind in the evening. This meant that the ancestors were unhappy, that they were forgotten and did not come to the grave.

According to legend, the hostess who is the first to prepare a meal on this day will be the first to harvest, and her family will be richer. The ancestors believed that the family who came to the cemetery in front of the rest would become the happiest and, possibly, gain special wisdom.

Parent's day in 2018 what date: how to behave in a cemetery

Arriving at the cemetery in Radonitsa, it is customary to light a candle and read the lithium. To perform this rite, you should invite a priest, but you can read the akathist about the repose of the dead yourself.

After that, you need to clean up the grave, be silent and think about the deceased. It is not customary to eat and drink at the cemetery, especially it is forbidden to pour vodka on the grave of the deceased, this insults his memory. Orthodox families should not leave a glass of vodka and bread near the grave, this ceremony is considered a relic of paganism. Food is also not left at the grave; it is better to give it to the hungry and the poor.

The Slavs and all Orthodox Christians have a custom at least once a year to go to the cemetery and commemorate the dead. The holiday itself is called Radonitsa or Parent's Day. Initially, it was a pagan tradition of the Eastern Slavs - a spring holiday of remembrance of the dead.

With the advent of Christianity in Russia, traditions and customs have not changed much, but the very essence has remained the same. Radonitsa - It is customary to meet Parent's Day 9 days after Easter. In 2017, the memorial day fell on April 25, because the Orthodox celebrated Easter on April 16.

The church notes that it is not necessary to arrange gatherings in the cemetery, and of course, there is no need to drink alcoholic beverages at the graves. It is also impossible to pour alcohol into glasses on graves, the Church is categorically against this. On Parent's Day, it is worth remembering the dead with a kind word, putting sweets on the graves of their ancestors, taking a sip of wine and cleaning them at the grave.

Many mystical cases are associated with this day. For example, a girl dreamed that her aunt complained about her eyes in a dream, explained something, talked about a wardrobe in the corridor. The girl decided that the dead were dreaming about a change in the weather, she read about this in one dream book. And a friend confirmed.

And two days later, the niece decided to put the winter clothes in her aunt's closet, which was empty. She opens the door, and her aunt's favorite dark glasses, which she brought from Germany, fall from the shelf. According to her niece, she felt creepy. But she coped with the excitement. The next day, the girl took her glasses to her aunt's grave.

Knowledgeable people say that you go to the cemetery, grab any little thing from your home that is left from another person who has gone into the world. You need to look carefully in boxes, cabinets. The look will stop in an inscrutable way on this thing.

Another case. The widow tells that she had a strange dream. She came to the cemetery, but she could not find her husband's grave. What? The state is alarming, but suddenly, to what trouble. I told my son. He, in order to calm his mother, did not postpone the trip until parental day, and immediately went to the cemetery.

And a strange story happens to them, like in a dream. They know perfectly well where the grave is, but they cannot find it. Circled around and around for a long time. Then they turned to a woman who was cleaning up nearby garbage. She sighed, crossed herself and utters a strange phrase: “Were you also called? You will find it. Where to get away from here? "

As the son and mother said, they were standing next to each other, only on the other side of the cross. We looked at the plate, and the inscription was completely washed away by the rains. We urgently went to the city, bought paint, on the same day they fixed everything.

And another story. A woman had a dream in which her other relative who had gone into the world began to come in her dreams and complain about something. The woman did not understand. I came to the cemetery, it turned out that the grave was washed away. The workers accepted the order for repairs, brought the land, did everything as it should be.

They say that the one to whom the relative is going to go to the grave knows in advance about this. And, supposedly in a subtle body, souls stand at the fence and wait. A person goes to a specific deceased - clean up, study, do not go around the cemetery, assessing who has what fences and monuments. Silence is needed. Therefore, they install a bench, a table.

It is impermissible to take anything home from the cemetery, not to mention someone else's inventory, gloves for work, flowers, objects. It is often undesirable to go to the cemetery. This is what people who know think. One should not assume that it is good if someone is at the grave for a long time. On any visit, you need to take plain water with you to water the earth, rinse your hands.

Parent's Day or, as it is also called, Radonitsa (Radunitsa) is a spring Orthodox church holiday of special commemoration of the dead. Po, Radonitsa is one of the most important memorial days, when it is customary to visit cemeteries where the graves of relatives and friends are located.

This is a day of blessed memory and, oddly enough, joy, because this joy is for the birth of the dead into a new life - eternal life. In order to prepare for this Orthodox holiday in time, you need to know what date is the parent's day in 2017.

When is the parent's memorial day celebrated

There are eight parenting days in the year, and seven of them fall on Saturday, and therefore they are called parental Saturdays. But among the parents' days there is the most important, the most important holiday of remembrance of the dead (Radonitsa), which always falls on Tuesday.

The holiday of Radonitsa does not have "its own" date, it is always celebrated at different times, depending on what date it falls on. In the second week, or, to be more precise, nine days after the Bright Resurrection of Christ, on Tuesday, the day of remembrance of the dead begins - the first parental day after the holiday of Bright Easter.

Memorial days are extremely important for every Orthodox Christian. They are also called "parental" so that we remember the need to take care of the souls of our ancestors.

It is imperative to know the dates of all memorial days, so as not to miss the opportunity to remember and commemorate your deceased loved ones, relatives and friends in time, go to the cemetery and clean up the grave.

History and customs of the holiday of the main parent's day

As the testimony of John Chrysostom says, this holiday was celebrated by Christians in ancient times. The very name - Radonitsa - took root in us from the all-Slavic spring pagan holiday with the indispensable remembrance of the dead, which was called Radavanitsy, Graves, Trizny, Navi Day.

The word "radonitsa" comes from "joy" and "kind", besides, this holiday takes pride of place right after the celebration of the Bright Easter week and, one might say, obliges Orthodox Christians not to go too deeply into grief for the dead, but to enjoy their eternal life together with the Lord God.

The entire Christian world celebrates Christ's Resurrection, His victory over earthly death, and then, nine days later, believers celebrate the rebirth of their ancestors, relatives and friends to a new life, remembering them on a special day - Radonitsa. The Resurrection of Christ, as a victory over death, supplants the sadness of separation from loved ones, and therefore on the ninth day from Easter we, as Metropolitan Anthony of Surzh said:

"... with faith, reliable and Easter confidence, we stand at the grave of the dead."

What to do on parent's day

Quite a large number of people visit their relatives and friends at the cemetery on Easter. Many, unfortunately, adhere to the blasphemous custom of accompanying visits to the dead with drunken wild revelry. And those who do not do this very often do not even know when on Easter days it is possible (and necessary) to commemorate the dead.

The first commemoration of the deceased after Easter takes place on the second Easter week (week), after Fomin's Sunday, on Tuesday. And the widespread tradition of going to the cemetery on the very holiday of Easter sharply contradicts the rules of the Church: it is impossible to commemorate the dead until the ninth day from Easter. If a person leaves for another world on Easter, then he is buried according to a special Easter rite.

Like many Orthodox clergy, priest Valery Chislov, rector of the church in honor of the Dormition of the Most Holy Theotokos at the Dormition cemetery in Chelyabinsk, warns against rash acts and other actions committed out of ignorance on the holiday of Radonitsa:

“It should be remembered that a cemetery is a place where one should behave with reverence. It is sad to see some people drinking vodka and singing worldly songs there. Someone crumbles bread and eggs on a grave mound, pours alcohol. Sometimes they arrange a real revelry. All this is more reminiscent of pagan funerals and is unacceptable for Christians. If we have already taken food to the cemetery, it is better to distribute it to the poor. Let them pray for our departed, and then the Lord, perhaps, will send some consolation to our relatives ”

Arriving at the cemetery on the feast of Radonitsa, you need to light a candle and perform lithium (pray intensely). A priest should be invited to perform the litiya during the commemoration of the dead. You can also read Akathist about the repose of the departed. Then you need to clean up the grave, be silent a little, remembering the deceased.

There is no need to drink and eat in the cemetery, it is unacceptable to pour alcohol on the grave mound - these actions insult the memory of the dead. The tradition of leaving a glass of vodka with bread on the grave is a relic of pagan culture and should not be observed in Christian Orthodox families. It is better to give food to the poor or the hungry.

How to commemorate the deceased

Prayer for departed relatives and loved ones is the most important and greatest thing that we can do for those who have passed away. By and large, the deceased does not need a coffin or a monument - this is just a pious tribute to traditions.

A simple wooden or metal cross is more befitting the grave of a true Orthodox. But the soul of the deceased feels a great need for our unceasing prayer. Saint John Chrysostom wrote:

"Let us try, as much as possible, to help the departed, instead of tears, instead of sobbing, instead of magnificent tombs - with our prayers, alms and offerings for them, so that in this way both them and us receive the promised benefits."

And special help for the departed is provided by their commemoration in the Church.

From this article you will find out what date Orthodox parental Saturdays will be in 2019. Also you will learn about the meaning of this Ecumenical worship.

Parental Saturdays in 2019

Often these special days of commemoration of the dead are called "universal parental Saturdays." This is not true. There are two Ecumenical memorial Saturdays: Meat (on the Saturday preceding the Week of the Last Judgment) and Trinity (on the Saturday preceding the feast of Pentecost, or also called the feast of the Holy Trinity - the birthday of the Church of Christ).

The main meaning of these "ecumenical" (common to the entire Orthodox Church) funeral services is in prayer for all the early Orthodox Christians, regardless of their personal closeness to us. This is a matter of love, which does not divide the world into friends and foes. The main attention these days is to all those who are united with us by the highest kinship - kinship in Christ, and especially to those who have no one to remember.

Parental Saturdays in 2019 fall on the following dates:

• - March 2, 2019.
• Saturday of the 2nd week of Great Lent - March 23, 2019.
• Saturday of the 3rd week of Great Lent - March 30, 2019.
• On Saturday of the 4th week of Great Lent - April 6, 2019 - the forefeast of the Annunciation, therefore the funeral service is not performed.
• Commemoration of the departed warriors - May 9, 2019.
• Radonitsa - May 7, 2019.
• - June 15, 2019.
• - November 2, 2019.

• Parental Saturdays in 2020 fall on the following dates:

  • Ecumenical parental Saturday (meat-eating) - February 22, 2020.
  • Saturday of the 2nd week of Great Lent - March 14, 2020.
  • Saturday of the 3rd week of Great Lent - March 21, 2020.
  • Saturday of the 4th week of Great Lent - March 28, 2020.
  • Commemoration of the departed warriors - May 9, 2020.
  • Radonitsa - April 28, 2020.
  • - June 6, 2020.
  • - October 31, 2020.

• Parental Saturdays in 2021 fall on the following dates:

  • Ecumenical parental Saturday (meat-eating) - March 8, 2021.
  • Saturday of the 2nd week of Great Lent - March 27, 2021.
  • Saturday of the 3rd week of Great Lent - April 3, 2021.
  • Saturday of the 4th week of Great Lent - April 10, 2021.
  • Commemoration of the departed warriors - May 9, 2021.
  • Radonitsa - May 11, 2021.
  • - June 19, 2021.
  • - November 6, 2021.

For the primary commemoration of our dear people personally, there are other parental Saturdays. First of all, these are the 2nd, 3rd and 4th Saturdays of Great Lent, and besides them - the parental Saturday established in the Russian Orthodox Church, which was originally intended to commemorate the soldiers who fell in the Battle of Kulikovo, but gradually became a common memorial day ...

This memorial service falls on the Saturday preceding the memory of St. vmch. Demetrius of Thessaloniki - patron saint of the prince. Dmitry Donskoy, at whose suggestion, after the Battle of Kulikovo, an annual commemoration of the soldiers was established. But over time, the memory of the soldiers-liberators was supplanted in the popular consciousness, which is very regrettable, and Dimitrievskaya memorial Saturday turned into one of the "parental days".

Why "parenting"? After all, we remember not only our parents, but also other people, often not related to us by any kindred ties? For different reasons. First of all, not even because parents, as a rule, leave this world ahead of their children (and therefore also, but this is not the main thing), but because, in general, our primary prayer duty is for our parents: of all people whose temporary earthly life is over, we first of all owe those through whom we received this gift of life - our parents and forefathers.

When is the next parent Saturday / nashreporter.com

On the eve of the great holiday, in a simple way - Pokrova-2018, believers honor the memory of their deceased relatives and friends - on Pokrovskaya parental Saturday-2018.

Later - November 3, 2018 - Dimitrievskaya parental Saturday is still waiting for us. It is no less significant than.

By the way, Saturdays are called Ecumenical, when all Christians are remembered in general (the main thing is to be baptized). There are only two of them: the aforementioned Trinity and Myasopustnaya (a week before Lent). On other parental Saturdays, people remember only the deceased who are close to them.

What is parental Saturday

In Orthodoxy, these are special days for the commemoration of the dead. Translated from Greek, Saturday means "intercession", which is why on such days it is customary to remember the deceased loved ones.

In Ukraine (as well as in Belarus), such days of commemoration of the dead are called "Grandfathers". These are the days when, according to popular belief, all deceased relatives invisibly gather for a family memorial meal.

Parent's Saturday: how to remember

They remember those who have departed into the world with a different prayer and memorial service.

Prayer for the dead

Rest, Lord, the souls of the departed Thy servant: my parents, relatives, benefactors (their names) and all Orthodox Christians, and forgive them all sins, voluntary and involuntary, and grant them the Kingdom of Heaven. During church services, Orthodox people commemorate many generations of their deceased ancestors by name.

Parent's Saturday: what to do

Believers go to church, ordering services for the repose. It is better on the eve of the Liturgy to submit notes with the names of relatives on a registered magpie. At the same time, notes are submitted only to baptized Orthodox.

Whenever possible, they visit the cemetery to visit the graves of relatives and friends.

But in no case should you visit the cemetery instead of the memorial service - the priests insist that going to the cemetery is more desirable than obligatory, but attending the service or at least reading the memorial prayers at home is a must.

Indeed, according to them, prayer is much more important to deceased people than visiting the grave.