Helping children who survived parental divorce. How not to make a child a "victim of divorce" and help him survive. Children can be conditionally divided into three age groups

It sometimes happens that a project called a family, or rather - a pair of two people - ends. The couple are forced to leave. We will not now analyze the reasons, scenarios and so on.

Now we will accept the divorce as a fact and think about what about the child or several children that this couple has? Of course, all family events are reflected in them. So what about divorce and kids? How will divorce affect the psychological state of children, and how should parents behave?

Navigation through the article: "Divorce and children: how to get through with the least loss"

It seems to many that children in divorce they will inevitably suffer that children must certainly grow up in a family where there is a father and mother who live together. Any family, if only complete.

This idea may be associated with the social attitude that children should take on the roles of mother and father, that only being in a complete family can they fully receive parental attention.

Many people think that this is the only way children will learn to build personal relationships and create their own family in the future. This includes movie plots, examples from fiction, and stories from friends backed up by their fears.

Divorce is inevitably associated with scandals, quarrels, suffering for both parents and children. And it's no secret that a sufficient number of couples maintain the appearance of a family only because of the children. How is it that dad (or mom) will live separately, because the child will be traumatized, will worry ?!

To be more precise, many do not even try to look behind this curtain and simply imagine what will happen. It's scary, it just shouldn't be that way, so you shouldn't even discuss it.

And the family, albeit dysfunctional, with spouses cooled to each other, family scandals, quarrels, and sometimes assault, continues to exist.

And what do the children themselves from such families, which survived “only for the sake of the children”, think? Interestingly, not all children who have become adults are grateful to their parents.

Children are very sensitive to the atmosphere in the family. And feeling that parents are unhappy, that they hate each other, children often take the blame for what is happening, and with this guilt they live for many years.

Let's think about it, and if the spouses break up, then do they stop being parents? After all, no one cancels parental rights and obligations. Spousal relationship ends , but nobody takes the parents away from the child.

And it depends only on the adults themselves how they build the process of joint education and communication with the child. after divorce... And that's what we'll talk about in this article.

To be able to help a child cope with this situation, parents must first think about themselves. Almost any divorce is stressful for each spouse, so steps must be taken to be able to deal with it.

Otherwise, falling into uncontrollable emotional crisis, parents lose control both over their condition and over the ability to feel the condition of their child and respond to it.

For acute situations, I often cite this example. In an airplane, in the event of a cabin depressurization, there is a mandatory rule - put on oxygen masks. Moreover - and this is very important! - first, an adult must put on a mask, and only then put it on a child.

It would seem that the opposite should be true. But if you think about it, then everything is correct - thinking about ourselves, we give the opportunity to help those who need our help.

Of course, the process of going through a breakup can be long. A person goes through several stages - an acute experience of the situation, emotional upsurge and a feeling of freedom, then a recession, possible depression and, finally, acceptance of the situation.

And sometimes you may want to speak out to your own child - especially if he is already old enough, and you know that he will understand you. Then the child runs the risk of becoming a "vest" - a friend or girlfriend, to whom you are ready to express everything that has accumulated and is painful. Moreover (this applies to the spouse with whom the child stays), the child is near, and will always be ready to talk to you and listen to you.

Here I would like to warn in advance about such a situation - a child should not become such a “vest”. He will not be able to fully become it: after all, he will hear and understand what you say to him at his own level, depending on his age.

And even if you have a completely friendly relationship, the child still perceives you as a parent, as an adult on whom the child relies. And if your despair and hopelessness is very vivid, the child may have a keen sense of insecurity. In the eyes of the child, even if the mother / father does not know what to do, then the fate of the child himself may seem completely sad to him.

During this possibly difficult period for your family, you should not overload the child's psyche. splashing out your emotions... Yes, emotions need to be lived and expressed, and it is very important to just tell someone everything, cry, talk.

But it is better to call a friend, girlfriend or other close person, try not to reprimand everything to your son or daughter. A psychologist is also suitable for this role - this is exactly the person who can adequately perceive your information, without criticism and unnecessary advice.

Starting their new life after a divorce, parents often either completely forget about the child because of their own experiences, or, on the contrary, they completely immerse themselves in him, thus trying to somehow switch attention, get away from what is happening.

Switching attention may be the right tactic, but find something else to do it. Ideal if in relation to the child after divorce approximately the same balance will be preserved as before, in a complete family.

During divorce, it is not uncommon for a mother or father to monopolize the child, depriving him of communication with the other parent. Here it is necessary to mention the desire to blame the ex-spouse, and tell the children about what their father or mother was guilty of.

It’s even worse if the negative trait that you see in your ex-spouse is emphasized in the child. Naturally, the spouse will not change this, but the child will add unnecessary worries and feelings of guilt. If you really want to discuss the painful, then, again, find another person for this who will be ready to listen to you.

What does a child hear when you say: “Are you as capricious (clumsy, illiterate, impudent, rude, etc.) as your dad (mom)” -? Most of your negativity is directed not even at your child, but at your ex-spouse. But the child takes everything quite literally - “I am bad, and I am naturally bad, since my dad (mom) is like that. Now I certainly won't be good. "

Added to this is guilt for what the former spouse did, to which the child has nothing to do with. Hence and low self-esteem, and learned helplessness (when a child learns in advance that it is useless to act to improve the situation, and does not even try to do something, this has a very negative effect on his future), and distrust of the world, and much more, which is reflected in the developing psyche.

Remember what we talked about at the very beginning. The separation of adults should not be reflected in the “mom-child” and “dad-child” relationship. Divorce and children - these are different planes of the situation. AND children in divorce have the right to maintain normal relations with both mom and dad, and with relatives on both sides. It is important to maintain the ability to communicate with both parents as much as possible.

Let's think, what does the family give to the child? Why is she to him? Based on our biological nature, the family is a physical opportunity for a baby to grow up. This is simply impossible without adults.

And the main thing that a child gets at the most basic level is safety and acceptance as a new person. Family roles, social conventions - this is all secondary, this is later. And during divorce, this basic, most basic and seemingly simple need often suffers.

The child ceases to feel safe - the world around him collapses. Sometimes, when parents divorce, children themselves try to reconcile and glue the family together. By doing this, they seem to save their world, which for them begins to collapse.

You should not go to the other extreme, deceiving the child that nothing is happening. No, something is happening - the family structure is changing, someone is leaving, communication within the family will also change. But, believe me, a child's psyche itself is very flexible, and he will be able to adapt to many things.

On a subconscious level, without words, the child captures the inner state of the parents. If the world is collapsing for you, then most likely you will project this feeling around you, pass it on to your child.

In situations where divorce is a completely deliberate step on both sides equally, and when parents are ready to take a constructive approach to solving and creating a new model of relationship, the child's sense of security may not suffer at all.

Children perceive a lot at the level of sensations, feelings. The mood of the parents is transmitted to them without words. Just imagine the situation - dad works out of town and is with the child only on weekends. Parents treat the situation as a work moment, everything is calm and good in their souls.

Will the child worry and suffer? Hardly. He, just like the parents, will understand that everything goes its own way. And what is the fundamentally different situation when a dad is with a child on weekends, but the parents are divorced? From the point of view of a child, almost nothing. The child is not yet loaded with social standards and conventions, as it should be. Therefore, the task of adults is not to bring “adult” questions into his world.

Even adolescents, from whom we seem to expect an “adult” attitude, in fact often treat the situation “like a child”, sometimes even responding with regression to a stressful situation (ie, starting to behave like young children) ... Therefore, leave an adult - an adult, without burdening the child with the expectation to somehow participate in solving issues related to you and your spouse.

In acute cases, an appeal to a psychologist will help in order to more easily get through this period and integrate into a new way of life, because life after a divorce will change. To prevent your anxiety from being passed on to the children, it is important to speak again and realize the fact that divorce is a separation between spouses, not parents and children.

Children may well survive the divorce of their parents almost painlessly. This is so, and there are such cases in my practice. The main thing is adequate adults who will be around. This is attention, love and sensitivity towards the child. This is how much you, as a parent, can convey a sense of security to your child.

After all, in fact, the child's parents remain the same. When parting with each other, parents do not cease to be mom and dad. And if you feel it yourself, then it will be much easier for you to go through this process and build a new form of relationship in which the child will feel loved.

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Divorce in a family with children is a huge emotional tragedy for both adult parents and minors. Moreover, the child, as a developing personality, is subject to the danger of psychological problems to a much greater extent. In science, a special term stands out, the so-called post-divorce crisis.

Children often blame themselves for the collapse of the parental marriage.

Parents need to very carefully and responsibly think over their actions, if it is impossible to save the family, in order to avoid dire consequences for their own children. It is unlikely that it will be possible to avoid experiences, but reducing their intensity and smoothing out the consequences is quite a doable task. The severity of the post-divorce crisis depends primarily on how the parents' behavior is structured.

Also, psychological and personal characteristics of children, their age, gender and degree of attachment to each of the parents have a great influence. You need to understand that each person builds his life based on the accumulated experience, the family and parents are the main example for children. Divorce will have a very strong impact on the world outlook and life attitudes of children, especially boys.

The older the son or daughter, the more the parental termination of the previous relationship will affect. In the case of divorce, it is worth taking very seriously the question of how to help the child survive the divorce of the parents.

Problems faced by children


Parents should help their child cope with their divorce

A child who is faced with a situation where his parents have ceased to be a happy and loving family, experiences shocks:

  • the baby's life is changing;
  • the life of the parents is changing.

His usual life changes dramatically, which contributes to changes in the behavior of the baby himself. A great danger is the emergence, feelings of shame for their family in front of the surrounding friends. Such children become withdrawn, they may have problems with communication, academic performance.

The life of the parents is changing, which cannot but affect the relationship with children. At the moment when a baby, whose usual childish world is crumbling, requires a lot of parental attention, but mom and dad are not always able to give it the proper amount, because for them this situation is also hardly simple. A frequent occurrence is a sharp deterioration in the attitude of parents to each other, which the baby cannot but notice.

This causes severe pressure on the psyche of the developing person. Former spouses go through serious experiences during the divorce, when not everyone can adequately build their own behavioral line. The parent with whom the baby remains to live after the divorce (more often it is the mother) often begins to influence by his attitude towards the second spouse (negative attitude).

See also:

What are the reasons for divorce after the birth of a baby?

Here the baby can either accept the position of the mother and hate the father, or not accept her position, which leads to isolation and misunderstanding in relations with the parent, with whom he spends most of the time. In the first situation, the father, who is trying to maintain a relationship with his son (daughter), meets a sharp rejection from the latter, which in some cases leads to the termination of contacts between the parent and the child or to an aggravation of the situation, conflicts, attempts to find out the reasons for everything that is happening.


The child should not choose which side he is on.

Neither the first nor the second situation contributes to the improvement and stabilization of the psychological state of the baby. In the second situation, the consequences can also be catastrophic, since the father can feel support and contribute to an even greater deterioration in the attitude towards the nearby mother. In both situations, the child begins to grow up inadequately, either with a bias of maternal influence, or with the influence of the father's authority, and rejection of the opinions and actions of the second parent.

A variant of the development of events is possible when parents, having failed to cope with their experiences, begin to blame children for all the troubles. This can happen both openly and indirectly. Emotional reproaches, accusations and offensive remarks addressed to a son (daughter) can seriously affect the state of a growing person, because he will not be able to understand the reasons for his guilt, especially since there are none.

Uselessness and guilt in everything that happens around, in the fact that mom and dad broke up, will lead to the formation of severe guilt complexes and low self-esteem. After the divorce, each of the parents will build a new personal life, which will lead to the appearance of strangers in the lives of children. This can also be a serious problem for the baby. He will feel a sense of hatred towards "uninvited guests in his life", be jealous of their presence near his parents, and feel unnecessary.

Parents have psychological problems. Each divorce is purely individual, but in most cases it is accompanied by difficult experiences for both husband and wife. In such a state, adults cannot always adequately assess the surrounding reality, which manifests itself in a decrease in attention to children, irritability, fatigue and apathy.


Emotional reproaches, accusations can seriously affect the state of a growing person

A child in such situations sees only the external manifestations of the tragedy he is experiencing, and evaluates everything in his address. He is of the opinion that his parents began to love him less. Lack of attention can lead to the fact that he will form misconceptions, become withdrawn and vulnerable.

See also:

How to provide a woman with psychological help in a divorce

Decrease in educational components in the life of children. When a child grows up in an atmosphere of a normal, healthy and strong family, each of the parents performs certain educational functions. With the rupture of normal family relationships, the usual upbringing system is disrupted. The parent, with whom the baby remains to live, takes on all the educational functions, but it is not so simple. The educational role of both mom and dad should be preserved as much as possible.

Helping children

How can you help children get through the difficult life changes associated with divorce as easily as possible?

Pay great attention to children, monitor their behavior and mood, try to catch all the changes at the initial stage in order to take measures to avoid the severe consequences associated with divorce.

Try first of all to find out the relationship between parents, and understand the paramount importance of the well-being of children. Based on this, together, jointly build a model of behavior and upbringing of a son (daughter). Both the ex-husband and the ex-wife must understand that for the full formation of a healthy personality of the baby, he needs both parents.

You should not try to maintain the signs of a single family, in order to avoid negative impact on children. Such measures will not do better. No matter how hard the former spouses try, the appearance will remain the appearance, there will be no happiness. Such a situation will lead to the accumulation of discontent and discomfort, and conflicts will arise. This will not make children happier. Watching how unhappy their parents are, they will take it all in their address. It is better to be happy individually parents and raise a baby together, than to create a false and unhelpful idea of \u200b\u200bhappiness in a non-existent family.

Be honest with your child. Spouses should together inform their child that they are forced to leave. In no case should you come up with reasons and excuses. The main thing is to avoid understanding by children of their guilt in what happened. The kid must understand the situation, understand that, despite the changes that have occurred, the parents will still love him. It is necessary to clearly realize that regardless of age, children understand everything, but they need communication and a competent explanation of the events taking place.


Give your children more attention

Pay as much attention as possible. And this also applies to mom and dad. Do not prioritize children's welfare, concerns, difficulties or interests. It is worth planning to continue spending time together, walking, attending cultural, children's and entertainment events. Do not limit the communication of the second parent, allow him to diversify the possibilities of spending time together, not limiting the trips to the cafe once a week.

Your parents are divorced. The world you thought was permanent and secure has collapsed, but you shouldn't feel sorry for yourself: about a sixth of teenagers have survived their parents' divorce. The disintegration of the family knocks the ground out from under the feet of children, no matter how old they are: both preschoolers and adults with several higher educations worry if their mom and dad become strangers to each other. Therefore, do not withdraw into yourself - your thoughts and feelings are absolutely normal.

Begin with yourself

The main thing is not to let the stress take over you completely. Weigh your worries and decide what worries you the most: fear of losing your mom's or dad's love, worries about changes in your life, or worries about one of your parents? Remember that the separation of your parents did not affect the love for you in any way - they love you. Both. Strong. It was difficult for them to break up because they thought about you. Do you doubt it? Talk to each parent about your feelings. Ask if their love for you diminished after the divorce? Do they want to communicate with you now? You will be surprised how sincerely your parents are surprised at your questions.

If you are worried about your future life, then try right away accept reality... Yes, mom and dad won't be together anymore. Drive away this hope. Don't try to reconcile your parents or “fight” their new partners. In the near future, you will get used to a new life, you will even find advantages in it: if you see your dad only on weekends, he will most likely devote them completely to you; you will be able to show more independence and, looking at your reasonable behavior, adults will really begin to listen to your opinion. Or maybe, thanks to the lesson you have learned, you will learn to value family ties and will never allow your family to break up in the future.

If you are overwhelmed by household chores, tell your parent. Ask to redistribute responsibilities.

Are you offended by your parents? Imagine that for the sake of their peace of mind, right now you need to start a family with an absolutely unsympathetic and, moreover, boring person: spend days with him, go to bed with him, take care of him. And never communicate with someone you are in love with again. An unpleasant fantasy, isn't it? So your parents shouldn't have sacrificed their happiness for the sake of keeping you calm. Sometimes the love between a man and a woman passes. Forgive them and think about how you can help.

Help me to improve my life

After the divorce and division of property, the money in the family will be less, especially if you live with your mother. Show that you can be a support in this situation. Try to help save:

  • if there are only a couple of stops to school or college, walk;
  • for a while, give up expensive entertainment: a trip to a cafe can be replaced with a picnic, a visit to a cinema - watching a movie at home, etc .;
  • watch your health, try not to catch a cold - medicines are very expensive;
  • handle your belongings, shoes, phone, etc .;
  • remember that some of the textbooks can be downloaded from the Internet for a small amount. If you need a book for just a few lessons, go to the library;
  • girls can learn handicrafts and create pieces of clothing and accessories on their own;
  • boys are able to master minor household repairs;
  • switch to a healthy diet - kefir and a bun are cheaper than cola and chips (you can also save money at the dentist at the same time);
  • if you have a choice - take water / sandwiches with you or buy in the city - take with you;
  • learn to cook. Frying potatoes and cutlets made from minced meat yourself is much cheaper than eating semi-finished products or buying ready-made food.

Believe in a change for the better and tell your mom about it. Any crisis has an end.

Try take on some of the responsibilities: walk the dog, learn how to turn on the washing machine, learn how to change light bulbs and screw in screws. And, of course, let everything be fine at school. This will free up time for leisure activities with parents. And now you need twice as much time, because you will have a rest separately with your mother and separately - with your father.

Taking on responsibilities at home, you will quickly become a mature person than your peers from full families, who usually have less responsibility.

Take care of your emotional state

If a parent is deeply depressed, and this happens often, help him not to be depressed. Make decisions yourself, because you can already take care of your loved one. What to do if mom / dad is completely "unstuck":

  • Tidy up the apartment - a person's well-being depends on the environment. Offer your parent to help you, or even better - ask for advice (how best to wash the windows, how to clean the microwave, etc.)
  • Try it out on the weekend pull the ancestor out of the apartment... A trip to the zoo, a walk along the promenade, a picnic, or the beach will do. Communication with nature calms and invigorates.
  • Small handicraft calms the nerves very well. If you "suddenly" get carried away with beading, knitting, embroidery or collecting puzzles and attract a parent to this, it will be just fine.
  • Sometimes it helps people to get out of depression by caring for those who are in a more difficult situation. If you do not dislike such activities, then volunteer: help in the abandoned animal nursery, spread information about missing people, distribute food to homeless people. And be sure to ask for the help of a parent - after all, you are a minor, you still cannot do a lot without adults.
  • If all else fails, and the situation worsens: a loved one refuses to eat, he has problems with blood pressure or sleep, heart pains appear, be sure to persuade mom or dad see a doctor... Sometimes the problem can be solved only with the help of antidepressants prescribed by the doctor.

When using any advice, remember to do it sincerely. Parents understand the "game for one viewer" immediately.

And there is one more thing in the psychology of men and women. important distinction: a woman, in order to survive a difficult situation, needs to talk about her, a man - for a while, hide in "his cave" and think about everything. Arrange a meeting with your friends for mom and leave home for a couple of hours. Without you, she can really say what she thinks. When helping dad, let him be alone for a while, and then distract him with some joint activity.

Become a wizard

You remember your childhood with your parents. You love both of them and wish them happiness. Therefore n help them not to make more mistakes:

  • Keep in touch with the parent who now lives separately. Call him when you miss. Talk about when and where you will see each other. He will be very grateful to you for these initiatives;
  • Take care of the fate of the parentwho was left alone. Tell him that you don't mind if he marries / gets married again or, for starters, will date someone. Do you like dating, making plans? Adults also need attention and love. And also imagine that in a few years you will become an adult, you will have a job, a loved one, a family. And mom or dad will remain alone and, perhaps, will no longer be able to build new relationships because of their age.

In this difficult period, you can become something like a wizard: fill the void that has formed in the life of one of the parents, forgive the other, help him find happiness. And the most important thing is to grow up. Not according to documents. On business.

  • Why are some prejudiced against children from single-parent families?
  • Why don't mom and dad want to burden you with homework?
  • How can you help a single parent?
Why is the child worried about divorce and how to alleviate his fate?

Should we stay together for the sake of the child?

One of the most traumatic events not only in a child's life but also for mom and dad is the decision to break up. Many families do not dare to leave for a long time because the family has children. There is no point in living next to each other when they are disgusting to each other or completely strangers. Children are more worried when destructive relationships concern them, either directly or remotely. The falsehood and lies of the parents will negatively affect the whole future life of the child. He will most likely grow up indecisive, with various fears and phobias. In addition, as long as the parents live for their children, they will miss the chance to become truly happy in new normal families.

How do I tell my child about a divorce?

Depends on the age of the offspring. The younger the child, the less he needs to explain. Until the age of three, it is generally not worthwhile to inform the baby about your decisions regarding whether the parents will live together or separately. At this age, the child still remembers little and, most likely, will not understand what is happening until he grows up.
For older children, for example, from 5-10 years of age, inform that one of the parents will not live with his family, but will visit as a guest or meet outside his home and yard.
The student no longer needs to be told anything, he himself will guess, but it is imperative to talk about this topic so that the child understands that his opinion is taken into account and is trusted, that he is a full member of the family.

Why are children experiencing parental divorce?

The fact is that parents in normal families mean a lot to a child. However, small children - from 6 months to half a year - still do not remember people and events well, so they may eventually forget the parent that they have not seen for a long time. The age at which children perceive divorce most painfully is from three to 6 or 9 to 13-14.
From 3 to 6 children already remember their parents well, show affection and love for them, but are not yet able to understand why parents do not want to be in the place. Children can issue radical ultimatums and try to manipulate their parents. Then it will affect the child's behavior negatively, both parents will have to satisfy all the children's desires so that they do not fall into hysterics and can move through life on their own.
For children, the family is indivisible, they perceive it only in this composition and nothing more. Therefore, divorce is hard enough for a child to worry about.

How to help your child survive divorce

In order for the child to quickly adapt to new living conditions and existence, in particular, the following rules should be adhered to:
  • Do not ignore the child's desire to talk about this topic, show by all means that he is not alone, that both parents will always support him, little will change for him.
  • You can't use a child as a bargaining chip. Try to manipulate your ex through it. Set the child against the father or mother.
  • Conducting communication through the child, such as “give him or her such a request or such information is not recommended.
  • Openly conflict with a child. Calling your ex-partner bad words.
You should also tell the children that they are not to blame for the divorce, support, help to survive all the surging feelings, talk a lot with the child, try to maintain good relations with the ex-partner. From time to time, go shopping together, visit various amusement parks, some interesting events, so that the child develops a positive attitude not only towards both partners, but also his future.

The young married couple was so happy after the wedding, after a while they had a charming daughter. New responsibilities, chores, worries appeared. She was tired at home, he was busy at work. And somehow it happened that he, "suddenly", fell in love with another. For her it was a blow, as if "something broke inside." Long weeks of tears, quarrels and scandals. As a result, a decision was made to divorce. But both parents were worried about the question: "How to make sure that the daughter is not very worried?"

"We decided to divorce ..."

After making a difficult decision to divorce, try to act in the best interests of the child, do not let emotions blind you. No matter how the relationship between you is developing now, remember that the child has the right to be loved by both parents. Don't make him a victim of divorce. A kid, accustomed to seeing parents together, will take a long time to get used to the fact that one of the parents will not be around.

New marriage: can stepfather replace father?

When a new family is formed, the child's experiences of divorce come to life again. But at the same time, a new marriage of mom or dad gives the child a new chance. No matter how positively the ongoing relationship with the father may have a positive effect on the development of the baby, he still lacks in everyday life.

Many mothers believe that in this case the natural father loses his functions, now there is a “other father” in the family who is always there and can take care of them. But paternal functions cannot be separated from the father's personality. Do not eliminate the father from the child's life, otherwise the baby will again experience the loss of a loved one that is significant to him.

Parents have unconditional love for their child; they love him simply because he is. The stepfather, as a rule, cannot feel such love: he met the child at a certain age, his feeling will be somewhat different.

Be prepared for the fact that in the process of "adoption" can be certain difficulties: two strangers need time to get used to, get to know each other and build further relationships.

If you notice that the child is avoiding intimacy, think about whether you have given too little time to him. “Meet me, this is my friend, Andrey. He will now live in dreams, you should call him "dad". It is not surprising that the child has become defensive.

Don't let your stepfather get involved too early in the parenting process, give orders, set taboos, comment, and punish. This will cause resistance and resentment. So you can force the child to obey, but you will not teach him to love. He needs to develop an affection for a new family member, and this takes a lot of time and patience.

The new spouse (wife) won the love of the mother (father), now it is just as important to try to win the love of the child. Get to know each other better, talk, learn about his interests, habits, favorite activities.

Do not try to erase the past: the child has a father, and he will also need him in the future.

It is very important that the father now understands that “another man” has appeared in the child’s life, he is “a stranger”, but, nevertheless, plays a significant role in the life of his son or daughter.

Divorce is a difficult life situation. First of all, think about the child and his safety. But don't let guilt consume you. Try to minimize the unpleasant consequences of divorce. Or maybe divorce carries a chance for good change? Think about it…

Sofia Pozdnyakova, child psychologist, Center for Problems of Education and Science "Overcoming"
magazine for parents "Raising a Child", June 2013

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